It’s the law: Matrimony man

About three weeks ago, my wife asked me a rather unusual question: Could I marry her best friend from high school? Coupled with the recent marriage of Press-Banner’s hallowed leader, Peter Burke, and his columns as he approached wedded bliss, it seemed only natural that I should write about my first and likely only, experience performing the nuptials.
The law allows a host of officials to preside over a wedding. A noncomprehensive list includes clergy, medicine men (assuming this is the title of a religious leader), Salvation Army captains, judges, most legislators and the county clerk.
Although a battle rages, marriage is historically a religious ceremony. Even if the participants weren’t particularly spiritual, I’ve experienced only one wedding where a religious leader did not solemnize the ceremony. Because marriage has ties to religion, it makes the law and lawyers queasy.
Those who remember their civics know of “The Establishment Clause,” or, as Thomas Jefferson termed it, the “wall of separation between church and state.” The First Amendment to the Constitution reads, “Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof.”
The clause received an attention boost a couple of years ago when a senate candidate from Delaware, Christine O’Donnell, famously (or infamously) declared to her opponent at a debate that there was nothing in the Constitution requiring distance between church and state. When her opponent quoted the Establishment Clause from memory, she blurted, obviously surprised, “That’s in the First Amendment?” As you might expect, ignorance of this level from a senate candidate, coupled with the ever-present tension between government and religion, gave the press a field day.
Although judges have differed on the meaning of this clause, there is no doubt that the Constitution demands that all religions enjoy some level of autonomy from government. Whereas government has intruded on some areas of religion, it has been quite hands off when it comes to who is considered a pastor or reverend qualified to solemnize the vows of marriage. It’s up to the particular religion. Some religions have very high standards for ordination, while other religions ask for no more than your desire to be a pastor in their church. The best known of the instant ordinations is likely the Universal Life Church. This is a recognized denomination that will ordain most anyone who is of age. They do not charge for ordination and will provide ordination credentials and other supporting material for a nominal price.
For those who don’t wish to be married by a religious leader, you can hunt down a judge or get the county clerk or her deputy commissioners to perform the ceremony. Or, if you really want to, have your drinking buddy perform the ceremony. Each county clerk has the power to appoint “deputies for a day.” Our Santa Cruz County Clerk has adopted the Deputy for a Day program. The fee is $120, and the clerk will put you through a 45-minute training program to assure that you perform the duties properly. You must choose a 24-hour period during which you can perform one ceremony anywhere in California.
I have heard over the years that Day Deputies cannot mention God during the ceremony. I know of no California law to prevent this, but some interpret the Establishment Clause as restricting any government official from espousing any kind of religious views while acting in that official capacity, even if you’re an official for just 24 hours. Still, I don’t know how it could be enforced, especially if the participants wanted some mention of God.
So, I had to choose between quick ordination or Day Deputy. The betrothed, however, wanted to swear before God their vows, so avoiding the wrath of the Establishment Clause police, I became ordained. It was a simple process, but it takes a few days for the church to review and approve your request. I was impressed by the materials available to us newly ordained ministers, including multiple sample ceremonies. I forwarded a few to the happy couple. They made some changes and ultimately adopted a ceremony in which the wedding party came dancing down the aisle. This made it easier on me, as attention was distracted from me bumbling the words.
I’ve known the bride for 25 years. She has always been an upbeat person, but her joy on this day was truly radiant. Although I was somewhat reluctant to be ordained without any qualifications, other than being a warm body over the age of 18, I must say that being matrimony man for my friend’s ceremony was overwhelmingly positive.
Gary Redenbacher of Scotts Valley is an attorney in private practice. Contact him at ga**@*********aw.com.