The Painful Side of Motherhood

Can we take a moment to talk about the pain in motherhood that some of you may feel?  You might not think of it as pain in the traditional sense.  It’s not the pain of childbirth or of a slow recovery, but it is pain nonetheless.  It’s awful, but it’s also completely unnecessary. 
The pain I’m talking about is physical, mental, and emotional. It’s possible that it’s a combination of all three as one tends to spill into the other until it’s a complicated web of messiness.  
Emotional pain may present as resentment at how much you’re expected to do or anger that parenting isn’t more equally shared.  You may feel overwhelmed at the level of responsibility you now have or depleted from giving until you’re in the red zone.  Maybe the emotional pain presents as a feeling of sadness or mourning of your carefree days of the past.  Maybe you wake up feeling defeated before the day has even begun.  You might feel lost, frustrated, or stuck.
Mental pain is sneaky because it’s the type of pain you may not be fully aware of.  It can present as guilt for taking time for yourself or more likely, guilt for not taking better care of yourself.  You may be telling yourself you’re a horrible mom for yelling at the kids (again). It might be the heaviness of a tense marriage aggravated from the resentment mentioned above. Mental pain shows up as constant negative self-talk and even situational anxiety or depression.
Physical pain is the type we’re most likely to be aware of. It can present as daily headaches or late-afternoon fatigue that leaves you reaching for ibuprofen, sugar, or caffeine (or all three). It might be an upset stomach or maybe it’s body aches, tension, or sheer and utter exhaustion.
Acknowledging the pain above doesn’t mean you don’t love your children. It doesn’t mean you don’t love being a mom.  It also doesn’t mean you’re a bad mom. It simply means that something is lacking and that something has a name. It’s called personal fulfillment and it erases just about everything on the list above. It means you’re prioritizing your physical, mental, and emotional health every single day. When you’re shown how to do it, it’s effortless.  
These are the things that no one talks about, but I do and will continue to do so. As tough as it can be to acknowledge pain, the only way to the other side is straight through it. Tip-toeing around the edges is a waste of your precious time and your limited energy. And it turns out that the most painful thing of all isn’t actually facing the pain, it’s never getting to the other side.You only get this one chance, this one beautiful life. 
Lauries bio below
Laurie Ann, RN is a leader in transformation and founder of The Fulfilled Mama Method, a solution for women who have lost their sense of self in motherhood.  She runs Simple Shifts in Motherhood, a free Facebook community, and her inbox is always open at 

la****@la*********.com