When we hear the term “self care,” we often think of solo activities—reading a book, journaling, taking a bath or going for a walk alone. But true self care isn’t just about what we do by ourselves—it’s also about how we engage with the people around us.
As a therapist, I often remind my clients that we aren’t meant to navigate life alone. Human connection is a crucial part of our wellbeing, and in many ways, community care is self-care.
The Science Behind Connection and Wellbeing
Research shows that having strong social connections reduces stress, improves mood, and even contributes to a longer life. When we feel supported by others, our brains release oxytocin, sometimes called the “bonding hormone,” which helps reduce anxiety and create a sense of safety and belonging.
On the flip side, loneliness and isolation can have negative impacts on our health, including increased risk of heart disease, stroke and mental health conditions. That’s a powerful reminder that prioritizing relationships and community is just as important as eating well, exercising and getting enough sleep.
What Community Self Care Looks Like
Community self care can take many forms, including:
• Checking in on a friend: A simple text or call can be more meaningful than we realize. If you are thinking about someone, reach out. Even a quick check in can make all the difference in someone’s day.
• Joining a local group or class: Whether it’s a book club, group fitness class, or standing lunch date with a friend, regular social interaction keeps us engaged and connected.
• Accepting help when it’s offered: Many of us struggle to ask for and receive support, but self care also means allowing others to care for us.
• Creating shared traditions: Weekly coffee with a neighbor, monthly game nights, or annual gatherings can give us something to look forward to and strengthen our sense of belonging.
• Giving back to organizations you care about: Volunteering your time, donating or supporting causes that align with your values can create a deep sense of purpose and fulfillment.
Self Care as a Community Practice
It’s easy to think of self care as something we do alone, but our wellbeing is deeply tied to the people around us. Building strong relationships, engaging in shared experiences, and contributing to our communities not only benefits others, it also helps us feel more connected, supported, and fulfilled.
If you’re feeling disconnected, start small. Reach out, initiate plans, or find ways to give back. Self care isn’t just an individual effort—it’s a collective one. When we show up for each other, we create a ripple effect that benefits everyone.
Maaliea Wilbur, a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, is Founder and CEO of TherapyWorks. For more information, visit mytherapyworks.com.
